I had no real plans for this summer. Anna was graduating, and Adam was getting married, but aside from that all I knew was that I was entering a new frontier. It was the Monday after Adam had moved into his new apartment, and Anna had left for a month of camp that I realized that this was the day I'd been waiting for. Back when there were too many diapers, too many stitches on rough and tumble boys, too many toys littering the house, and too many years ahead of me to try to teach 1,2,3 and A, B, C to my littles. I'd often daydreamed of the day that I would wake up to a morning all my own. It was that day that I cried for what was no longer mine.
It made sense that I would take the ladies church group's summer schedule in hand and put all it's events on my calendar. After all, I was free. It made sense that I bought the summer reading book, whatever it was, and prepare for the end of summer book discussion. It made sense that I get on a plane and fly out to see a friend who moved away four years ago. After all, I would sit in a seat next to Anna on her way to her first post high school trip. It would be fun!
What I didn't expect, was the change my trip would bring. I'd really had no expectations. I was just changing the scenery and seeing a dear friend. That was all I knew for sure. I tucked the ladies' summer read into my carry on.
I wasn't expecting the pruning. I arrived with a bunch of dead branches caging me in. I'd treating them like a safety zone, but they were really a prison. As long as I left them there, and refused to cut them away, I would not be able to grow. My gifts would not matter because they would be masked by the ugliness of the old dead limbs that were constricting the joy and marring the beauty. So as I pruned the neglected roses outside my friends new house, I felt God's truth quoted to me that week brightening my eyes, ligtening my heart, and coloring my soul.
As God reached me through the words of a friend, he sought me also in the Sunday sermon at her church, and through the dear hearts and listening ears of her Bible study friends. We attended two weekly studies while I was there, and the lessons were sweet and encouraging. Becoming a Women of Strength. I really needed to hear that. Thank you ladies for your hearts and your prayers! (Yes, in this photo I was crying.)
On the plane headed west I started to read. Evelyn. The main character, happened to be the person I identified with the most. She among all the ladies who came into her life was the one who seemed to struggle with similar things as me. I finished Book One by the night before I returned home. I learned the importance of having women in your life. Those you can be real with, and accountable to.
The Summer held a lot of promise. I'd come home free from the burden of trying to make people like me. Or, of believing I was a bad person because I was mistreated by some people. I began to work on the habit of reminding myself that I am not responsible for the way other people treat me. I am responsible for how I treat others. Always. To take offense is a choice and I should choose instead to look behind the hurtful actions for a wounded heart, a different cultural perspective, or some hurt within myself that is making me a bit too touchy. Love.
With the kids gone, and Fran flying away on a work trip, it was time for yet another "vacation"! What a priviledge to spend a week in Eustis. When I am there I sigh deeply that I am "home", and I sometimes pinch myself thinking, "I get to live here." Maine is so beautiful. Even better, I have a friend in my Aunt Anne. What fun we had when Tina came in to visit with us!
Soon I had to come home and do the next thing. I had a Rehearsal Dinner to pull off! Thanks to my friend Jennifer, however, my load was lightened. Marrying off a child isn't something done lightly, and she often swooped in to encourage me with Godly counsel. I love this photo; I was thinner three years ago when it was taken! Oh, and we were in the middle of production and we were actually smiling! (The photo is by Adam.)
While reading the 2nd, 3rd and 4th books in that series, I realized that my summer wanderings were taking me among friends. Jodie suggested our trip to the Botanical Gardens. Another friend I met through our kids' drama group, we hit it off from the start and it's great to visit when we aren't talking shop!
After the wedding I visited with Karen at Reid State Park. We've known each other for about 30 years. Our kids are grown, and sometimes it's good to look back and talk about it.
The next week I invited a brand new friend, also named Jennifer, over to pick blackberries. Even in the short visits while working, you can share a burden and promise a prayer. We need friends to help us carry our sorrows to God.
The next day was a visit to the Knitting Circle at the local library. I've known Dawn for 15 years and she and I started that group many years ago. She has carried it faithfully, while I stopped going for probably most of Anna's high school years. Still, it brought back to me how important it is to get out among other ladies. This photo is from the earlier days of Knitting Circle.
The challenge to show joy. This is a tough one for me. The day after meeting up with my joyful friend Dawn, Kristin and I grabbed coffee at Bohemian Coffee House. We took it across the street to sit in the fresh air of the Brunswick mall. During our long chat she shares with me the desire to find joy in women's hearts. It really stopped me and made me wonder if I have that. Do I show joy? I don't think so. I'm always thinking. Judging. Why do I do that? Be at rest, and trust, and smile because of what God has done. That should be enough, but do we let it be enough?
The next day, I picked up Tina and we met Jodie at Castle Tucker. It was a grown up field trip! I'd been there before, but now there was much more to see. New friends. Now Tina and Jodie have met, and we will be doing more trips in the future.
The next day I met Kerry and Donna in the Old Port in Portland. What a blast we had. They are good friends, and I met them through TeenPact. I've never visited with them together. Turns out we are all alike in that we don't know how to capture a selfie on our cell phones. A passerbye helped us at least capture the moment!
Can you tell where we went for dessert and coffee/tea?
The next day was a visit to Charissa's. We were supposed to paint shutters, but a little rain came and dampened our enthusiasm for that outdoor project. Instead, we stayed inside to visit, and to draw up plans for my new kitchen. I think Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup cake is a perfect lunch on a day like that.
The culmination of my friend odyssey week was chatting with Nicole and Beth who are in the background here, at the 3rd annual Fried Dough day at Lee Anne's house. The three of us all have read the Sister Circle books and talked about how we have been learning the value of friends in our lives. (The photo is Lee Anne's.)
od·ys·sey noun \ˈä-də-sē\
: a long journey full of adventures
: a series of experiences that give knowledge or understanding to someone
There are many lessons to learn as we spiral through the stages of our lives. Each friend will have a different word of encouragement that stems from her own personal journey. We all have a responsibility not only to share in the triumphs, but also to look a friend in the eye and share a truth that is hard to hear. When you truly trust, and then truly listen, there is freedom. Whether you are touring, walking, planning, picking berries, sharing a book, or drawing a kitchen, you are sharing. You are learning about each other, and challenging each other to be honest, caring, and transparent. If a trusted friend has personally challenged you, except it as an expression of God's heart.
:-)
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